


I've Never Been Here Before

by axolotlnerd-campcamp (axolotlNerd)



Series: Rivers And Roads [3]
Category: Camp Camp (Web Series)
Genre: Anxiety, Counselor/Camper Shippers DNI Please!, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Light Angst, Police, Welcome to Being A Mom 101
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-06
Updated: 2019-05-06
Packaged: 2020-02-26 22:59:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18726583
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/axolotlNerd/pseuds/axolotlnerd-campcamp
Summary: After a chaotic night and a possibly impulsive decision, Gwen and Max start the first steps to creating a home, and both of them have to deal with their anxieties about the situation.____________________Note: This is the 3rd installment of my series Rivers And Roads. Please read the first couple of fics in the series before this one!





	I've Never Been Here Before

**Author's Note:**

> So, we have a series here. And let me just say, I think is the best decision I've made as an author. I have so many ideas for this, at least two more stories and I'm open to ideas and suggestions!
> 
> Thank you all so much for reading!!!

Gwen imagined that, if emotions were like alcohol, she was emotionally hungover. Her body and mind were both exhausted from the night before, anxiety and sorrow and sympathy draining the energy from her body.

She stumbled out of Sadie’s room, suddenly hit by how bright the apartment was compared to her roommate’s room. Sadie had blackout curtains for the times she had to sleep during the day, and it made it too easy to sleep in. Gwen could smell chocolate and sugar from the hall, and when she turned, she could see Sadie wrapped up in her work, typing furiously on her laptop.

“Mornin’.” She said, louder than normal. Sadie jumped in surprise and looked over to Gwen with a laugh.

“Morning,” She said, her voice so much softer compared to Gwen’s. “Is Max awake yet?”

“Dunno.” Gwen shrugged as she turned into the kitchen. The cake, still in the pan, had a piece taken out of it, and the note Sadie had written had either fallen or been carelessly tossed back on the stove. “I think so. You made him a cake?” It wasn’t anything fancy, but it looked homemade, and maybe that was a good thing.

Sadie turned in her chair. “I felt bad about the whole situation, and I thought it’d be a fun little project. He’d probably be hanging out in your room now, right?”

Gwen nodded. It was strange to see that this wasn’t a dream, that along with online college classes and work and trying to keep a social life she’d be doing this now, too. She knew she should be stressed, wonder how the hell she was supposed to maintain all of that, but more than anything else she was relieved to know that Max was safe.

_ David would want to know about this. _ Gwen thought suddenly. God, David would probably know what to do here better than she would. He’d probably already have everything handled. Hell, he’d know where to start.

“You still in there?” Sadie asked, and Gwen looked up.

“Sorry, what’d you say?”

“I was asking if you knew what to do today.”

“Um… Sort of.” Gwen answered. She leaned back on the counter with a sigh. “Gotta talk to child protective services first, probably. Go grocery shopping. Cash my paycheck first, though. Set up a room for him.” She listed.

“Well,  _ first,” _ Sadie started. “You have to call work and let them know you’re not coming in today. And then we have to go to the police.”

“What?”

“If his parents put out a missing persons report, we could get charged with kidnapping.” She explained. “So we have to go there and let them know what happened, and  _ then _ we can tell them that we’re trying to get custody of him.”

Gwen nodded as she explained it. Sadie had always been good at planning things — Gwen found her strengths in dealing with crises in the moment. “He’s not gonna like this,” she said with a small laugh.

Sadie smiled. “He can deal with it, right?”

Gwen nodded and stood up, running her fingers through her hair quickly to shake off the last of her tiredness. “I’m gonna get ready for all this, call work and everything. You gonna come for all of this?”

“I should, they might want to hear from me at the station.” She replied, and Gwen nodded again, walking to the bathroom to get ready for the day.

 

Gwen struggled to find clothes that weren’t her work clothes, but still looked professional. At least enough to make her look like she wasn’t a complete mess, despite how she felt. It resulted in her digging out her camp t-shirt and her nicest pair of jeans — all of her other shirts were too loose or ragged, or had book or TV characters on them.

She knocked on the door to her room lightly, and at not hearing a response, opened the door. Max’s plate and fork were left on the nightstand, and he’d made himself comfortable and fallen back asleep.

Gwen poked him in the shoulder, shaking him awake. “Hey. Twerp. Get up, we’ve got things to do.”

Max groaned. “Ugh. So that wasn’t a shitty dream-” He stopped short as he turned, looking at Gwen. “Oh, God, and you’re wearing the damn shirt? Christ, this better not be like camp again-”

“Look who’s talking,” she said with a smile. “You’re the one who’s wearing your camp shirt for pajamas.”

Max glared at her, and though his lips were pulled into a small frown, his eyes were bright with comfort.

“Come on,” she said, ruffling his hair. “We got errands to run if we want to make this work.” At that, Max sat up, rubbing his face and stretching. Getting ready to face the day.

 

Everyone was anxious at the sight of the police station, and everyone dealt with the anxiety differently. Max glared and kept his hands in the coat Gwen gave him to use today, too big but he’d have to make do without his hoodie. Sadie looked at the station doors nervously, crossing her legs at the ankle as she sat in the car. And Gwen charged headfirst into the situation.

When she and Sadie explained the situation to the clerk at the front desk, a police officer came from the back and took Max into a private room, and before long someone else came and asked to speak to Gwen in private as well.

“Can you tell me exactly what happened last night? Every detail you can remember.” The officer asked, sitting across from her at a big gray table.

Gwen nodded. She looked anxious,  _ felt _ anxious, police had always made her nervous and she really hoped that the officer that spoke to Max wasn’t as big and imposing as this one. He wrote on a notepad as she explained what happened, then asked more,  _ what’s your relation to Max? What summer camp did you work at? Do you know anything of his parents? _

None of her answers felt good enough.  _ I was a counselor at the summer camp he went to, that’s it, _ she said.  _ Camp Campbell, out in Sleepy Peak. Only that they were negligent, and that Max resented them. _

Before long, the officer stood up, explaining that he’d be back in a few minutes and telling her to stay where she was.

The waiting made her anxiety worse. She realized that she’d left out the part about Max telling her not to come, and she began to wonder if he would mention it and if it would make her seem uncredible or unfit, and then she began to wonder what they were going to ask Sadie, and then she started wondering what was  _ taking so long, _ and if something had gone wrong. They wouldn’t have found anything on her criminal record, unless speeding tickets and car registration expirations showed up, but what if that was enough for them to call her unable to care for him? God, what if-

Her thoughts were interrupted by the click of the door opening, and she turned to look. A woman, tall and wearing a suit and pencil skirt, walked into the room. Her dark hair was pulled into a tight bun, and her skin was a pale, colorless shade. Her smile did nothing to comfort Gwen.

“Hi.” She said, sitting down. “My name’s Lilian Shelton. I’m with social services.”

Lilian offered Gwen her hand, and she felt a chill down her spine as she shook her hand. She asked more questions, more things that Gwen didn’t feel like she was good enough for.

“What’s your apartment like?”

“Quiet. Our neighborhood is mostly small families, and there’s a park and mini-mart at the end of the hill. Sadie and I mostly watch movies and shows for fun.”  _ And they’re not kid friendly. Not that Max is. _

“Sadie, she’s your roommate, right? What’s she like?”

“A bit shy, but caring. Hard working. Creative. Responsible.”  _ Stubborn as a mule. Forgets to eat or sleep if she’s not reminded that her body needs fuel. _

“What does she do for work? And you?”

“She does freelance programming and web design, works at home. And I work at Sofia’s Pizza as assistant manager, out in Ashboro.”  _ And I probably don’t make enough money to handle all of this on my own, and if me and Sadie didn’t have each other we’d probably fall apart. _

She was probably criticizing herself too much. She must have just been too tired in the morning to really worry about all of this, because all of a sudden she was so scared she’d fuck this up, suddenly she was sure that she’d end up raising someone like herself.

Lilian took a moment to write on a clipboard. “Well, we can see this is an emergency situation, and though you’re not registered to be a foster parent just yet, you meet all of the requirements. We’ll bend some rules and see what we can do. There are going to be some classes you’ll have to take, and in order for you to leave Max in Sadie’s care she’ll have to go through a background check and maybe one or two other things.”

Gwen wanted to ask if she was kidding. She had convinced herself that something would go wrong, that she’d slip up and say she had an anxiety disorder and trauma and that her family history was just a big line of mistakes and disorders and that she was just another link in the chain.

Man, her therapist was going to have a field day with this.

 

Before long, they said that she could wait for Max and Sadie in the main office. The room was all gray and blue, missing person posters on the wall and calls for lost items and animals, advertisements for local activities. The only time she’d been in a station like this before was when she was at camp, cleaning up one of Campbell’s messes.

Sadie was led back into the main office after a short while, and Gwen asked what she’d been asked. “Not much,” she replied. “Asked if they could do a background check, and what part I’m playing in all this, I guess. They asked if we both wanted custody. I said that I would probably just be the babysitter, if that’s okay with you.”

“No, that’s fine,” Gwen smiled. “You think they thought we were dating?”

“Probably.” Sadie laughed. “God, we’d be a mess.”

Gwen laughed with her. “Hey, you have any idea why they’re taking so long with Max? I’m a bit worried.”

Sadie shrugged, and looked around. “I don’t know. I’m sure it’s fine.” She comforted, but she didn’t seem sure.

It was another ten minutes before he was brought out, and his glare was as sharp as it ever was. Gwen thanked Lilian when she walked out with him, and after she got her phone number she said she was free to go.

“Before we go, what should we do about getting his things from his foster parents? I gave him a coat and pair of boots to borrow for the day, but he’s still going to need other things-”

“Don’t worry about it,” Lillian interrupted. “We’ll take care of it. I’ll bring it over sometime later today, what time will you guys be home?”

“We’ll be shopping for a bit, grab Max some new clothes and sheets for his room, and food for the house, so probably 4:30? 5?” 

Lilian nodded, and said she was free to go.

When she got in the car, she looked at Max in the rearview mirror. He had his legs drawn up, curled into a ball as he glared out the window. He wasn’t yelling at Gwen, which made her think he wasn’t  _ that _ bad, but him not being sarcastic and mocking seemed worse.

“You okay back there?” She asked, and Max’s eyes flickered up to the mirror and then back to the window.

“Yeah.” He said simply.

“You mind if I ask what they talked to you about in there?”

Max shrugged. “How I knew you, what the apartment’s like. What my last house was like.” He said the last part quietly, and Gwen decided not to press any further.

“You sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah. Thanks.”

 

Clothes shopping was up first on the list, Max having admitted that he didn’t have snow boots or a winter coat at home. All he really wanted was a coat — blue and eerily similar to his hoodie, and Gwen began to consider the reasoning behind that — and a pair of boots. She grabbed other things, sheets and a thick comforter, and she asked what Max liked to do for fun, to which he responded with an apathetic shrug.

“You like to read? Barnes & Noble is right next door, we could grab you something there.”

“S’whatever.” Max said, almost lethargic.

Gwen looked to Sadie, who was looking through the clothes racks absentmindedly. Of course she wouldn’t be concerned, she didn’t know Max (Had they talked at all? Did Max even know her name?), but normally he wasn’t this passive. She turned to look at him again, trying to investigate while he stood and looked around the store, bored. “You’re  _ sure _ you’re okay?”

_ “Yes, _ Christ.” He hissed, and Gwen was only slightly comforted by his bitter tone.

“Alright, I’ll let you be. You just seem tired. What should we do for lunch?” Max shrugged in response, and Gwen frowned. “The grocery store has cheap meals, they’ll probably have something for you.”

Max walked with Gwen and Sadie as they finished shopping, and when either of them asked if he wanted anything for his room, he would shrug and say something along the lines of “I’m fine, thanks”. 

He seemed more interested in picking out a book. Gwen and Sadie gave him suggestions, as he normally just read whatever his teachers gave him, and  _ you have no idea the kinds of books 50-year-old women who’ve been divorced twice think kids would want to read, _ Max said. In the end, he picked out the first of both the  _ Percy Jackson _ and  _ Harry Potter  _ series. 

When they got to the grocery store, Gwen stopped just passed the entrance. “Alright,” she started. “Lead the way.” Max didn’t move for a second, then looked up at her, a confused look in his eye as if to ask  _ you mean me? _ “We’re going shopping to get you food, and the only thing I know about your diet is that you hate the slop they served at camp. So lead the way.”

Max looked at her for another moment, scanning her. “Seriously? You’re not gonna try and convince me to pick something from the organic section? No lecture on how to eat healthy?”

“God, no. Maybe later. You just got here, go make a day of it.”

He seemed like he didn’t really know what to do at first, wandering around the area near Gwen as she looked through the produce aisle for sales on fruits and vegetables, and he quietly threw in an orange to the pile. Once they moved on, he seemed to get a grasp of it, grabbing two bags of cheap chips and the sugariest cereal he could find, maybe just because he could. He also added popsicles to the mix, and a few cups of yogurt with candies to mix in.

“Not bad,” Gwen commented when he said he couldn’t think of anything else. She was surprised to see that most of his choices had any sustenance at all.

Sadie peeked in the cart. “You don’t want chocolate? What?” She said, almost pushing it all into one sentence. Before Max could answer, she continued. “We gotta get you some chocolate. What do you like? Ice cream? Cookies?”

Gwen expected Max to snap something sharp at her, something along the lines of  _ who the the hell are you anyway? _ But he simply looked at her, a little confused but not angry. “Can we get more cake? That was good.”

Sadie’s dark eyes lit up, and she smiled. “Thanks! That was really my first try at cake, but we should definitely do it more. What are you doing just standing there?”

Suddenly Gwen realized that Sadie and Max were walking away, waiting for her to come over with the cart, and she shook her head and apologized, catching up to them quickly.

“You never really introduced yourself,” Max commented to Sadie.

“Right! Sorry. I’m Sadie, roommate and babysitter. Gwen told me a lot about you when she got back from camp.”

“Good to know I left a good impression.”

 

After buying everything and then eating in the grocery store, they quickly stopped at the thrift store to make sure Max had enough clothes now that the weather was getting colder, and then they went back home. Gwen made phone calls in Sadie’s room while she and Max sat in the living room and put on TV. At 4:00, a soft knock sounded through the home, and Gwen quickly wrapped up her call to answer it.

Lilian stood at the door, accompanied by a man much taller than her. She carried the small blue-green backpack Max always had when Gwen picked him up from school, and the man held a fairly small cardboard box.

“Hi, Gwen!” She greeted, overly friendly. “Glad to see you’re here. We collected Max’s things — would you mind if we came in for a minute?”

Gwen immediately felt all of her anxiety from this morning flooding back. “Sure. It’s a bit messy right now, we’ve just been hanging out since we got back, but-” She turned around, looking inside the apartment for a moment and seeing Sadie peeking into the hallway and Max nowhere to be found. “What happened?”

Sadie looked to Gwen, a confused expression on her face. “I’m not sure, he bolted as soon as he heard the door open.”

Though Gwen looked confused, Lilian seemed unmoved by it. “We see that a lot in kids from abusive homes. They make private spaces, like their room or the bathroom, a sort of ‘safe space’ for them to retreat to. When they hear things that might show them something’s off — the parents coming home, someone yelling, doors slamming — they’ll go to their safe space.”

Gwen immediately felt her heart drop, as if it was her fault. More than anything, she felt bad that that was even his reaction to something as simple as the door opening. “Should I ask him to come out so you guys can take a look?”

“If you think he’d be okay with it.”

Gwen nodded, and walked up to the door, carefully tapping her knuckles on it. “Hey, you alright in there?” She asked. It was quiet for a second, and then Max opened the door, quickly heading back to the bed. He had grabbed one of his books and seemed happy to make a spot for himself on the bed while Lilian and the other social worker looked around.

The man kneeled in front of Max, looking at his book. “Hey, kiddo. What’d you do today?”

He immediately glared at the man, and as much as he wanted to snap at him for how condescending her sounded, he’d had enough experience with social workers to bite his tongue. “Shopped.” He said, short and clipped.

The man nodded, smart enough to tell that maybe Max wasn’t the kind of kid he’d assumed.

Lilian and him moved on, and Gwen looked back at Max before she left the room. The kid had both his middle fingers up at them, and Gwen stuck her tongue out at him in response.

After a brief inspection, the social workers left, Lilian giving Gwen her phone number and leaving the house with a plastic smile that made her shudder. After they left, it wasn’t long before Max came out of the room, a tired glare settled on his face.

“I hate social workers.” He grumbled.

“I think I do too.”

 

Sadie eventually got anxious sitting around and doing nothing, ending up working until the late afternoon, beginning to teeter on the edges of sleep as she curled over her computer at the dining room table. Gwen was quick to scold her and tell her to go to bed, to which she hastily jumped up and exclaimed “Right!” before going to bed.

“Where are you gonna sleep?” Max asked.

Gwen patted the air mattress beneath her. “We got this thing out here, so if I go to bed before Sadie wakes up this’ll be fine. Plus, I got more blankets to make sure we have enough.” She explained. 

Max nodded, staring vacantly at the TV. He had taken his hoodie out of the box of things Lilian had brought, not putting it on but holding it to him in a tight ball. After a moment, his gaze flickered downward, and he looked to the ground as his eyebrows furrowed, frown tightening.

“What do you want for dinner?” She asked, and Max shrugged, not seeming to really think about it. “Alright, hope you like Kraft mac n’ cheese then.”

Max huffed, a small laugh escaping him as Gwen stood up. While they didn’t talk much as they ate and watched  _ Family Feud, _ Gwen got the sense that Max liked it, him making small comments every so often.

“Why is it that it’s  _ always _ a black family versus a white family?” He’d ask, and Gwen would laugh, realizing that she’d never noticed it before.

“You should go to bed soon.” She said, tapping Max with her elbow. “You’ve looked exhausted all day. Plus, I think after this episode it’s going to  _ The Price Is Right, _ and I don’t want to feel like I’ve gotten that old.”

Max laughed, quickly followed by a yawn, but he didn’t move.

“Come on, I’m not carrying you to bed this time.” She nudged him again, and he hummed as he swayed, standing up. “You can read, just no more TV. It’ll rot your brain and all that.”

Max followed her to his room, and she grabbed the extra comforter she’d bought to put it on the bed.

“Anything you’re gonna need?” She asked. “Water? You can crack open the window if you need fresh air, just make sure you open the left side, the right side doesn’t have a screen-”

“Hey, Gwen?” Max interrupted. 

“What’s up?”

The kid sat on the bed, his hoodie thrown onto the foot of it and him with the blanket pulled over his legs. He gripped the blanket, looking down at it almost as if he were ashamed.

“You know you don’t have to do this, right?” He said, quietly.

Gwen sat down across from him at the foot of the bed.

“You can tell them you changed your mind. You don’t have to do all of this. The books and sleeping in the living room and all of the social services bullshit. I’ve dealt with this before. I can deal with it again.”

How painfully familiar that phrase was becoming.

Gwen didn’t move, trying to think of what to do or say. “Well, I won’t. I’m gonna keep buying you books and sleeping in the living room and dealing with all of the social services bullshit. And you’re gonna have to deal with it.”

Max looked up at her, his green cat-eyes almost glowing in the darkness. He scanned her, trying to find a hint of sarcasm or falsehood in her expression, but she smiled comfortingly.

“It’s gonna be weird and confusing, and I’m probably gonna fuck up more than I’ll want to admit. But I’m not going to make the mistake of giving up on you. You deserve a good home, Max. If that means I have to make do with what I have and make it for you, I’ll do it.”

It was quiet for a long moment, and Max looked back down at the blanket.

“Go to bed. It’s been a long day.”

Max nodded and laid down, but didn’t fall asleep as quickly as he or Gwen thought he would. He was still awake when she left the room, and when she returned with his bear and carefully put it on the bed next to him.


End file.
